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“You should not have to take things away from a horse or break him in fragments in order to train him; rather you should add to the horse. The goal should be making, not breaking”   Cherry Hill

Start Close In by David Whyte

Start close in, / don’t take the second step / or the third,

Start with the first thing /close in, / the step /you don’t want to take.

Start with / the ground you know, / the pale ground / beneath your feet, / your own / way to begin / the conversation.

Start with your own / question, / give up on other / people’s questions, / don’t let them / smother something simple.

To hear / another’s voice, / follow / your own voice, / wait until that voice / becomes an intimate / private ear / that can / really listen / to another.

Start right now / take a small step / you can call your own / don’t follow /
someone else’s / heroics, be humble / and focused, / start close in, /don’t mistake / that other / for your own.

Start close in, / don’t take / the second step / or the third, / start with the first / thing
close in, / the step / you don’t want to take.

For the traveler by John O’Donohue

A journey can become a sacred thing:
Make sure, before you go, / To take the time
To bless your going forth, / To free your heart of ballast
So that the compass of your soul / Might direct you toward
The territories of spirit / Where you will discover
More of your hidden life, / And the urgencies / That deserve to claim you.

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Where is the open window?

I would like to share this short video: https://dianepooleheller.com/trauma-structure-baby-gears-demonstration/, in which Dr Diane Poole Heller, somatic attachment and trauma expert, briefly discusses multifaceted trauma history, which she calls trauma structure, by using a Baby Gears to demonstrate how similarly to baby interlocked gears when we are working with trauma we find that everything interfaces or interlocks with another trauma or issue and another. She says that ‘in these complex trauma systems, which I like to call the trauma structure, one trauma can feed into another and another and another, because everything is connected!’. So we need to proceed with caution when working with this complex system of interconnected gears/ traumas. As we take away smaller pieces or gears there is gradually more space to work with more significant issues or traumas or vice versa. She discusses how she worked with a neurosurgeon client who suffered serious brain injury during a car accident and how they proceeded by working on smaller issues or small t traumas like his performance anxiety and his desire to do a guitar performance with his daughter. Through working with this smaller issue that was on the edge of the bigger things like the car accident he was able to allow healing resources to move because like traumas they can also interface, and thus, increase resilience and decrease overwhelm or resistance. Dianne Poole Heller says that ‘trying to tackle too many difficult traumas all at once can make it hard for clients to resource themselves enough to really come to a resolution with any one issue’ and suggests: finding the open window (or the point of entry) in order to stack the cards in our favor, build resiliency and always listen to the body. On a personal level, I found the Baby Gear metaphor really helpful – a metaphor of complex trauma that brings clarity. I have sometimes perceived it as a Lego construction, where each new small t or big T trauma is latched onto a previous one, and thus, in some sense, the major traumas are reinforced, and buried deeper and the smaller issues gain potency through this process of interlocking, creating a more resistant structure. Anyway, the video brought to the foreground a road accident in Italy in 2002, but in the light of all the narratives and lesser issues that were interlocked with it.

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‘There are no extra pieces in the universe. Everyone is here because he or she has a place to fill, and every piece must fit itself into the big jigsaw puzzle’ Deepak Chopra   

Those who have been visiting my site probably know that I like going to the cinema. When I write a post, a movie like any other experience, may be the springboard or the inspiration for me to sit and write, and I usually situate myself in the narrative. Anything can create an urge in me to write and actually many ideas start their emergence in dreams or meditation. For instance, when I meditate on the sofa I like to feel the soft carpet-rug under my feet. Along with my woolly socks it comforts and grounds me, especially on a cold day. There have been many moments when I have been tempted to get up and write about that, the mat, the rug, or maybe the sofa, all the things they mean to me and all the stories, images and metaphors they conjure up. Anyway, I recently went to the cinema to watch The Green Book directed by Peter Farrelly. It is based on a true story, which for me does not have to be read as a biography, more an opportunity for the creator to tell a story inspired by events and people. Personally, I found the film heartwarming, with some funny moments and interestingly layered. Like a myth or fairytale it contained multiple themes and could be read at multiple levels.     Read more…