Places Edited / March 2nd, 2025
And pets
“We who choose to surround ourselves with lives even more temporary than our own, live within a fragile circle, easily and often breached. Unable to accept its awful gaps, we still would live no other way.” Irving Townsend, cited in The Book of Pet Love and Loss: Words of Comfort and Wisdom from Remarkable People by Sara Bader
In today’s post I have included four more images related to place. This whole series of drawings refers to places in Greece, but today I’ve included one of Alexandria, which I have not visited. I have accompanied it by two extracts from Alexandria: The City that Changed the World, a book I am currently reading by Islam Issa. The book is available in Greek.
I’m also referring to a second book I’ve been reading recently. It’s The Book of Pet Love and Loss: Words of Comfort and Wisdom from Remarkable People by editor, Sara Bader, and it contains stories of love and loss of our non-human animal companions. When Bader lost her thirteen year old cat she says she felt in Steinbeck’s words, a “jagged hole” in her life. She writes: “Disoriented and overwhelmed, I did what I often do in crisis: I searched for a book that could guide me through that painful time. I knew what I wanted to read: memories, advice, and encouragement from others who had been down the same path—small portions of literary nourishment that would provide solace and perspective without requiring sustained concentration. I wanted to hear the voices of familiar cultural figures, who understood the experience and felt compelled to write or talk about it. I hoped their words might serve as trail markers for me.” She then put these stories and photos together to create the book she had wanted to read.
Last Sunday we had to have one of our cats put to sleep. She was a quiet, gentle creature, which had somehow found its way to our house several years ago, not in good health at the time. We had thought someone would claim her or that she would return to her owner, since it was obvious that she was a pet cat, but no one came and she never left the garden. Last week her health deteriorated rapidly, and we decided to take the vet’s advice, painfully realizing that it would probably be the most humane thing to do; however stroking her fur while the vet administered the shots of anaesthesia and then leaving the clinic with an empty carrier was heart wrenching.
Mousafirissa, which translates into Visitor, because we had believed she wouldn’t stay with us long, spent a lot of the day on the garden furniture. Now, when I look out of the kitchen window I see the empty space, the gap she has left, and I realize how much space the creatures, we take care of and care for, take up in our heart.
As I was looking for something relevant to read I came across Bader’s collection of stories from literary figures, artists, musicians, politicians, and others.
Bader writes: “The first signs that they are slowing down are often so subtle, we barely notice. They nap more. They hesitate before stairs. They walk gingerly over rough gravel roads and are less inclined to take off in a joyful sprint. Their muzzle starts to show a bit of white frost. And yet it also seems to happen overnight: suddenly we realize our companion is getting on in years. Animals teach us how to live, but they also teach us how to age—how to hold on to optimism and humor, in spite of growing limitations……………… If we’re fortunate enough to accompany an animal through the journey of aging, we’re also granted the enormous responsibility of deciding when it’s time to say goodbye. It’s understandable that we might become overwhelmed by anticipatory grief and focused on how our world will soon change, but the musician Fiona Apple encourages us to try to be present for this final chapter, to “appreciate the time that lies right beside the end of time.”
Also, after the loss of a pet we realize that the sorrow can linger, resurface after a long time, and also bring up prior losses. Bader mentions: “We have lost not only a loved one and true ally but also a connection to older versions of ourselves. Pets accompany us through emotional milestones…………….. They may have also walked by our side through the death of loved ones, which helps explain why mourning a pet might remind us of past losses, compound grief that can persist for some time.”
A few extracts from the book:
“If we’re lucky, we will love a procession of animals over our lifetime, which, of course, means accepting the painful reality that we will inevitably have to say goodbye to them as well. “Grief is the obverse of happiness,” the legendary record producer Irving Townsend reminds us. “They are two sides of a single coin, and only the vulnerable know either.”
“I didn’t have any brothers or sisters, and cats and books were my best friends when I was growing up. I loved to sit on the veranda with a cat, sunning myself.” Haruki Murakami, Japanese writer and translator
“My dog and my mongoose were my sole companions. Fresh from the jungle, the latter grew up at my side, slept in my bed, and ate at my table. No one can imagine the affectionate nature of a mongoose. My little pet was familiar with every minute of my day-to-day life, she tramped all over my papers, and raced after me all day long. She curled up between my shoulder and my head at siesta time and slept there the fitful, electric sleep of wild animals…… I placed an ad in the papers: “Lost: mongoose, answers to the name of Kiria.” There was no reply. None of the neighbors had seen her…. She had disappeared forever…. I was grief-stricken for a long time.” Pablo Neruda, Chilean poet, diplomat and politician, who won the 1971 Nobel Prize in Literature
“Oh dear, how old she is, and how touching in her old age, carefully choosing the smoothest bits of road to cross by because gravel and roughness hurt her old paws and make her stumble as she totters along.” J J. R. Ackerley, British writer and editor
“Mister, in particular, holds a special place in music history. He and Holiday were inseparable. He patiently waited backstage or sometimes in the bar while she sang. “As long as he heard her voice, he’s happy,” recalled the vaudevillian comedian, Harold Cromer, who often performed in the same venues.” Billie Holiday was an American jazz and swing singer
Charles Schulz, the creator of the universally known cartoon character Charlie Brown, wrote about one of his dogs: “He had been an unbelievable joy to me, and as I write this I am deeply sorrowful…… Andy brought some new truths into my life. He taught me the wonderful love that a person can have for a dog.”
“If someone asked me to truly describe myself in an abstract frame, next to me there would be a small mark, like a smudge, and that small mark would be my cat.” Tracey Emin, British artist
“It is very unreal, and one wonders when one will get used to it…. But, of course, one can not easily get over seven years of intimacy.” Sigmund Freud, neurologist and founder of psychoanalysis
The famous painter Georgia O’Keeffe loved big dogs. Bader writes about one of her dogs: “Bo held a special place in O’Keeffe’s mind and memory. She was still thinking about him near the end of her life, in her nineties. In a letter of gratitude to a friend, the photographer Todd Webb, she recalled the day Bo died. “We drove out into the White Hills, dug a hole under a small-sized cedar bush and put my beautiful dog into it and covered him with earth and many rocks,” she wrote. “I like to think that probably he goes running and leaping through the White Hills alone in the night.”
Finally, a brief reference to John Steinbeck (and his dog), who was one of my favourite writers in my youth. I have read many of his books, but had not heard of Travels with Charley, which was released in the summer of 1962, the year that he won the Nobel Prize in Literature. Bader considers it an iconic travelogue of his three-month road trip across America, with his dog Charley. They drove through 34 states, on highways and backcountry roads, to rediscover America. Bader writes: “Travels with Charley is an extraordinary record of friendship. Two and a half years after they set off on their cross-country adventure and nine months after the book’s release, Steinbeck was missing his copilot: “Charley dog died full of years but leaving a jagged hole nevertheless.”
“By making Alexandria rather than himself the subject of the poetry, Cavafy explored the inescapable relationship of Alexandrians to their home, best summarised when he acknowledges that ‘The city will follow you’. Cavafy reminds us that comprehending a place so infused with history and myth is not a matter of either perception or conception – it is both. To Cavafy, past and present Alexandria are strikingly similar. He imagines the city through the eyes of Greek Byzantines who’ve migrated from Constantinople, halfway in time between Alexandria’s founding and his own life: ‘Always, Alexandria remains herself’, he wrote, ‘For all the harm it’s suffered in its wars, / for all that it’s diminished, still a marvelous place’. The act of imagining Alexandria’s past inspired Cavafy to understand its present.”
“Around the world, many places have a founding myth, a story about origin that serves to create identity. In Alexandria’s case, there are many such myths and no straightforward identity. Partly because of the absence of hard history of the ancient city – physical and architectural evidence – underneath the modern metropolis and in the depths of the surrounding sea. Partly because its founder, Alexander the Great, is himself one of the most legend-steeped figures of all time. In Alexandria, myth plays a role in both the founding and advancement of the city, its landscape and its people.”