Food

“Our food related narratives give access to many ingredients that can contribute to our identity, communities we belong to, family culture and dynamics, identification, reaction, choices, values, aspirations, ….  and our intergenerational inheritance.” Linda Cundy

“As late capitalism and social media rewrite the terms of engagement and what it means to be seen and heard, so too the body becomes a battleground.” (From The Guardian by Susie Orbach)

Fry Bread: A Native American Family Story by Kevin Noble Maillard &Juana Martinez-Neal

Listen / Watch at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MibEeGiFThM

Food like oxygen provides us with the very basic sustenance that keeps us alive. Food also features in most of our relationships: between newborns and mothers, parents and children, couples, families, and every other context, where we share food with others. Food and food habits serve as a channel of display of affection, and the sharing of food optimally signals a bridge of connection and acceptance. For young children mealtimes can provide an opportunity for the development of social interaction and language learning, as well as, oral motor skills by being introduced to a variety of tastes and textures, On the other hand, mealtimes can become contexts of control and conflict, and food or the lack of it can become a tool of oppression and control at a societal and global level. Either way our dependence on food is inescapable and universal. In this post today I have decided to lightly touch upon a great number of food related themes and lens through which to view food, such as, early attachment and feeding, adverse childhood experiences and food disorders, especially, during adolescence,  food, mealtimes and relational dynamics,  food as an expression of identity, values, and way of life, Kitchen Therapy and how cooking has had a profound evolutionary effect for humans, how home food-making, gathering around meals, belonging and identity are negotiated  by immigrants, our relationship with growing food and our planet, social oppression and food, and how historical contexts of hunger and famine do not only victimize those going through it, but the detrimental effects are passed on horizontally and vertically, and can affect all aspects of life, including the biology and functioning of future generations, as research relevant to the Great Famine in Ireland (1845-1852), for instance,  has shown.

The feeding of the baby does not only literally keep it alive, but when the attachment is secure enough it provides the earliest experiences of pleasure, intimacy and safety. This first experience with nourishment, food and feeding can often, to one extent or another, become the site of unconscious representations, feelings and sensations. All of us learn safety, comfort, satisfaction or / and anxiety, hostility, or rejection in this early experience of interdependence. In her book, Trauma and the Body, Pat Ogden writes “The physical experience of the caregiver’s gentle, attuned ministrations to the infant’s signals pertaining to sensation, touch, movement, and physiological arousal, as well as to his or her sensitivities/ vulnerabilities regarding sensory input and other physical needs (e.g., food, warmth, fluids) establishes the infant’s initial sense of self and sense of his or her body (Gergely & Watson, 1996, 1999).  Our early relationship with food and feeding provides one context for secure attachment to develop or not. It may also influence our later experiences with eating, food and our bodies. These early experiences with food can become associated with connection, intimacy, sense of been seen and cherished, pleasure and satisfaction or conflict, rejection, deprivation, control or both. How we nurture and take care of our self or deprive ourselves later on in life, how we treat others around meal times or how giving and generous we are can often, at least partly, be traced to our early experiences. We often unconsciously re-enact or repeat attitudes and behaviours we experienced early on.

Food and meal times are very important in family life, and apart from the physical sustenance they provide, they also convey both benign and harmful messages and modes of communication. In, The Mindful Home, Dr Craig Hassed claims that studies suggest that, from the perspective of child and adolescent wellbeing, the most important time in the day is the evening mealtime. Our experience of food, eating and gathering around a table can be grounded in love, care, connection, generosity, gratitude, sharing of knowledge, celebration and coming together, but also, explicit or implicit hostility, conflict, control, punishment and manipulation. Around the table, especially, when we are young we absorb messages, even if they are not verbally articulated. Non verbal communication is the sending of information through our body language, facial expressions and gestures, friendly eye contact or lack of it, or tone of voice. Mealtimes can reflect family dynamics, attachment patterns and role distributions. Among friends and in other social settings we can also observe various dynamics and hierarchies or social practices and customs. In a couple’s relationship food and feeding can shed light on how individual preferences, equality, intimacy and other dynamics are negotiated or not. For people who have a lot of narcissistic traits food will be used to channel abuse and exert control, wearing down people, emotionally and physically, over time. Making someone go hungry, controlling how much they eat, displaying aggression around food and meal times or projecting unconscious issues can give a false sense of empowerment, but can be detrimental for those on the receiving end.

It is interesting to observe how traumatic childhood experiences are entangled with food or how food is used as a coping mechanism and even defense against feeling or living. In her book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown writes: “When we’re anxious, disconnected, vulnerable, alone, and feeling helpless, the booze and food and work and endless hours online feel like comfort, but in reality they’re only casting their long shadows over our lives.” The well known Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) Study that involved 17, 337 adults, who were followed for the next two decades, revealed how early traumatic experiences often lead to adult health risks, auto immune diseases and addictions, including eating disorders and obesity.  I’d like to add that in this post I am mostly concentrating on the psychosocial aspects of our experiences around food and eating, and there are many other factors that contribute to health concerns around weight issues, for instance, that go beyond the focus of this post. Factors like genetics, a variety of health conditions, side-effects from medication, and so on, can also be at play.

Also, addiction to food and over-eating are not the result of psychological factors only. Dr Craig Hassed claims that in recent times three things have happened in relation to food in developed countries: “food has become readily available; the energy required to get food has decreased significantly; and food has become much more processed so that much of its nutritional value is refined out and empty calories pumped in. The problem with this arrangement is that it causes the brain’s pleasure centre to be over-stimulated in such a way that we feel compelled to keep seeking such readily available pleasure…. beyond what is healthy or reasonable. This leads on to addiction. Another issue is that when we feel sad or stressed we get short-term relief by stimulating the brain’s pleasure centre. So we might eat for comfort, consolation or pleasure but we don’t often eat for need or health. Yet while eating stimulates the brain’s pleasure centre, the strange paradox is that poor quality nutrition is a significant risk factor for poor mental health.  Healthy nutrition is therapeutic for mental health because the brain needs the right nutrients to function well and make all the neurotransmitters and hormones it must make to keep us happy.”

Adolescents seem to be the most at risk group to develop eating disorders due to social, biological and psychological factors. Attachment theory provides a basis to understand the role that early childhood experiences and familial dynamics can play.  Linda Cundy writes: “One of the earliest opportunities for expressing agency is provided by the small child’s mealtimes.” Our sense of self is forged in early relationships and attachment experiences.  Attachment that is significantly inadequate can leave children struggling for safety and identity, and an eating disorder may be a coping mechanism for an absent or overly negative self-definition. In their paper, Eating disorders in adolescence: attachment issues from a developmental perspective, Manuela Gander, Kathrin Sevecke and Anna Buchheim write that attachment has an important influence on how young people can deal with the challenging transformations during adolescence because secure attachment relationships provide emotional support, comfort and availability during stressful situations and moments of important change. In securely attached infants, attachment events have led them to anticipate their caregivers’ availability, understanding and responsiveness. As a result they will experience themselves as competent and valuable, but when caregivers respond in a rejecting manner or inconsistently, children tend to experience themselves as incompetent and unlovable. They write that “According to attachment theory, a secure quality of attachment relationship is crucial in solving developmental tasks in adolescence like adjusting to physical changes, creating their own identity or defining goals for the future and thus represents an important buffer for psychological risks.”

In relation to anorexia, bulimia and other eating issues, they write that the overall pattern of results from adolescent samples suggest that most of the adolescents with eating disorders have insecure attachment. Results regarding links between diagnostic subgroups and the two different insecure attachment styles are not consistent. Some authors found a higher prevalence of the avoidant and others found more anxious individuals among adolescents with eating disorders. There are of course other contributing factors apart from our early upbringing like culture, collective intergenerational trauma, societal ideals and media trends that influence our relationship with food and eating, for better or for worse.

Food and eating is a universal experience and it is an expression of identity, values, and way of life. In some sense our relationship with food, food choices and relationship to growing, preparing and consuming food become part of our identity. Psychotherapist Linda Cundy claims that we can understand a lot about people through learning about how they eat, but this area is usually ignored unless they present with a serious eating disorder or weight issues.  By exploring the bigger picture of food and eating, and the relational environment in a person’s life we go beyond the symptoms.  People’s relationship with food in relationships can provide insight into relational dynamics and their own narrative about themselves and their life. Also, our childhood memories of dishes and recipes, and particular food related to our ethnic group or local kitchen, cultural and socio-political values around food production, our own or our family’s involvement in food production or preparation all become part of our identity and life narrative. In the book, Attachment, Relationships and Foods: From Cradle to Kitchen, Linda Cundy writes: “Positive memories of food can become precious and sustaining memories: a secure foundation for our sense of identity.”

While reading for this post I came upon Kitchen Therapy, which is defined by Charlotte Hastings as a creative approach for exploring relationships with food and people, the kitchen providing a setting for resolving internal and interpersonal conflicts. She writes: “it is a way of using food, cooking and eating to explore clients’ inner worlds, support mental health and enhance their relationships – whilst making great food for the table.” She adds that this resulted from her training as a psychodynamic therapeutic counsellor, while teaching adults domestic cookery, where the potential of talking therapy and cookery became apparent. She observed that how we cook, give and share food or not is the way we live. Food can be used as a metaphor, exploring our histories around food, feeding and being fed or a particular dish can be explored or there can be a combination of teaching and learning about themselves, food and cooking.

In relation to cooking and the broader process of preparing meals anthropologist, primatologist and professor at Harvard, Richard W. Wrangham, PhD, believes that the transformative moment that gave rise to the genus Homo, one of the great transitions in the history of life, stemmed from the control of fire and the advent of cooked meals. His theory suggests that the human brain became significantly bigger than our ancestor’s through the process of cooking with fire. He believes that cooking had a profound evolutionary effect because it allowed our human ancestors the ability to process food more efficiently, which in turn allowed for less time spent on foraging, chewing, and processing foods. This extra energy facilitated survival and reproduction. Meanwhile, the bodies of these early ancestors responded by biologically adapting to cooked food, shaped by natural selection to take maximum advantage of the new diet. Eating cooked foods and meat made it easier for our guts to absorb calories. Cooked meat also increased energy that would have been otherwise used to chew raw foods throughout the day and allowed for a smaller more efficient digestive tract. As a result less energy was spent in digesting foods and instead was diverted toward the expansion of the human brain.

Also, what we cook is an expression of who we are and where we come from, and often traditional dishes or rituals around eating are preserved outside their original cultural confines. Thus, family connection, cultural and geographical ancestral links are maintained through certain foods and meals. A study conducted by Hsien-Ming Lin, Ching Lin Pangand Da-Chi Liao in Belgium sheds light on how home food-making, gathering around meals, belonging and identity are negotiated by immigrants. From experience being brought up  in an immigrant household I have witnessed the interesting dynamics between food, identity and belonging, and how food can facilitate the creation of bridges with the past, the homeland and the host country. For my mother cooking traditional meals created a sense of continuity and connection to her roots. She also integrated Australian recipes or ideas into her Greek repertoire and shared Greek dishes with people from the host country. In the study there is mention to the lengths that the participants went to obtain ethnic products and when they could not find them in the local market they grew their own produce. I have vivid memories of the Greek deli and a few other shops that imported Greek products from sweets to books and records that were not yet widely available in shops.

This particular study involved Taiwanese immigrant women in Belgium and it examined their daily food practices and experiences of making home/ethnic foods while living in a foreign land, their subjective meaning-making regarding home foods, especially in the immigrant context, the social and emotional functions of food. Many studies have explored the role that home/ethnic foods play in immigrants’ adjustment journeys. For instance, the tastes of home/ethnic foods can release and decrease the emotions of nostalgia. In this regard, in this article, it is said that “immigrants refer to foods derived from their home country as “comfort foods” in their foreign life, since these foods provide positive psychological effects and further improve people’s wellbeing.”

In terms of relational dynamics it is suggested that the daily food arrangements and the negotiation of different tastes in intercultural spousal relations could be regarded as the reflection of immigrant women’s position and its power hierarchy within the family. Moreover, it is noted that immigrant women’s family and power position could be demonstrated through the consequences of whether their family members accept the foods cooked by their immigrant family members or not. In the study some participants talked about how they negotiated their home cuisine with the Belgium cuisine within their familial or couple contexts. Also, the researchers of this study refer to research that has found that eating home and ethnic foods can successfully reduce immigrants’ sense of loss and up-rootedness and further enhance their sense of belonging toward their host society and immigrant life, and also, that consuming home/ethnic foods is a crucial strategy adopted by immigrants to connect their previous life with their present one. Researchers have further found that many immigrants consider sharing traditional or ethnic foods from their home country with friends or neighbors in the host society to be a useful strategy for expanding their social networks and cultivating interpersonal relations in their immigrant life. So, home/ethnic foods become tools used by immigrants to cultivate and manage friendships and social networks in the host society and to construct their new place-identity and sense of belonging in the host society.

In this research paper it is also suggested that from the viewpoint of Social Identity Theory, home/ethnic foods are vital resources and references used by people in delineating the boundaries that ethnically distinguish between “us” and “others,” since different ethnic groups have their own special food cuisine cultures and food consumption habits. In this regard, for some people, eating home and ethnic foods may become the strategy for performing their ethnicity or social group identity. The research authors write: “People may attach their sense of belonging to, or even construct place-identity with, a particular place or space by utilizing specific foods as their linkages or references.” Additionally, it has been found that when immigrants face discrimination in the host society due to their immigrant or ethnic minority backgrounds, they may increase the possibility of choosing the “downplaying” strategy to decrease the importance of their ethnic characteristics, by insisting on speaking the host society’s local language in front of others rather their mother tongue or lowering their willingness to consume home/ethnic foods. This means that contextual factors like different living circumstances and the level of local residents’ tolerance regarding cultural/ethnic differences and immigrant groups impact immigrants’ attitude toward their own cultures, ethnic backgrounds, and food consumption habits.

Another topic related to food is how the lack of it is linked to oppression. Hunger in its various forms can be a means to control and to weaken masses of people through what is often “un-survivable” lack. Food oppression can be systemic. Hunger is a potentially deadly form of oppression and causes a lot of suffering. As we all know across the globe one form of oppression is malnutrition, which is widespread, especially, in developing countries.  Malnutrition, while not as obvious as famine and starvation that happen around an event and can often wipe out whole families, is widespread and can be passed down from generation to generation, Social oppression, which among other things can include racism, economic oppression, persecution on account of one’s beliefs, determines to a great degree who suffers from hunger and who doesn’t. Social oppression and inequity influence where you go to school, what you do in your free time, what work you get or not, what or how much information is available to you, where you live and what food you can buy (while I was gathering information for this post I read that one aspect of the high food insecurity among Native Americans in tribal lands comes from lack of access to full service grocery stores. For example, Navajo Nation reservation, spans 17 million acres and the total amount of grocery stores is about 13, which practically, means a resident would have to drive around 3 hours one-way for a trip to the grocery store),

In the book mentioned above Linda Cundy gives an example of how oppressive and detrimental hunger can be for people for generations to come, and in particular, how epigenetic changes due to starvation may have affected the mental health of later generations in Ireland, and changed the basic biological make-up along with all other aspects of life. Cundy refers to the high statistically measured incidence of mental distress and more serious mental disorders among the Irish and claims that it has been traced back to the Great Famine (1845-1852).  She writes: “the consequences of massive unresolved grief, along with rage against those who allowed such a catastrophe to happen, could inevitably influence an individual’s parenting: trauma handed down to the next generation through disorganised attachment between a parent who survived the famine and a child” Extreme poverty does not only impact biology and development, but it can also impact relationship with food later on, even when conditions have changed for an individual or a group.

There are certainly more ways to explore food in connection to many other themes like growing food and community and how people’s identity changes when they grow food, and how the physical labour involved and the contact with nature can have an impact on people’s bodies, psyches and sense of identity. Another area of concern and exploration is our dysfunctional relationship with our planet, which reflects broader dysfunctional beliefs and systems that are related to our consumerist trends, industrial agriculture and abuse of animals. However, I think this is a good place to end this post.

Meanwhile, I’ll share a short extract from an article by Susie Orbach, British psychotherapist, psychoanalyst, writer and social critic, in The Guardian:

“An understanding of the bodies we inhabit as biological organisms with limits is no longer enough. As late capitalism and social media rewrite the terms of engagement and what it means to be seen and heard, so too the body becomes a battleground. It is being stretched and pressed into new forms of service, display and identity as, at the same moment, we are coached towards a dematerialized existence, where almost everything we understand about living – eating, breathing, moving, feeling, relating – will occur in the realm of thought, not in the physical, worldly body……

To address these dilemmas, restoring the body as a reliable place to live from, requires a challenge to our current beliefs and aspirations. The conditions of late modernity are not inevitable. The very tools that have given rise to the narrowing aesthetic could be redeployed to include the wide variety of bodies people actually have: diversity not conformity. In our belief that the body is almost infinitely modifiable, we have become prey to industries and practices that frequently increase our sense of insecurity. We aren’t being creative with our bodies and having fun with them. We are, rather, attempting to create bodies that make us feel better about ourselves……

We need bodies sufficiently stable to allow us moments of bliss and adventure when, secure in the knowledge that they exist, we can then take leave of them……”

Art

“This sweet Labrador is Minnie, Tabitha’s best friend. We introduced them when Tabitha was a baby cheetah, and we raised Minnie alongside Tabitha to help tame her. Whatever Minnie does, Tabitha wants to do……… While the zookeeper began sharing facts about cheetahs born into captivity, my older daughter, Tish, nudged me and pointed to Tabitha. There, in that field, away from Minnie and the zookeepers, Tabitha’s posture had changed. Her head was high, and she was stalking the periphery, tracing the boundaries the fence created. Back and forth, back and forth, stopping only to stare somewhere beyond the fence. It was like she was remembering something. She looked regal. And a little scary. Tish whispered to me, “Mommy. She turned wild again.”  Glenon Doyle

I’m posting the first painting, I’ve just completed, of a couple of paintings focused around a dancer theme that I’ve been working on. The figure in this one was partly inspired by Edgar Degas’ famous bronze sculpture Little Dancer of Fourteen Years. The first art and artists we find or are introduced to in childhood or adolescence usually leave a more lasting impression. In her book, Living Color: Painting, Writing, and the Bones of Seeing, Natalie Goldberg referring to her first exposure to art through her aunt writes: “From then on, I began to notice paintings— in books in the public library, even hanging in the beauty parlor, and in the waiting room when my father consulted a lawyer. The world of painting sprang up to illuminate my world.” These fisrt memories of art linger on.  Pablo Picasso’s Girl on a Ball or Young Acrobat on a Ball, a 1905 painting which he produced during his Rose period that depicts a group of travelling circus performers, is another painting that left its impression on me when I was young. This spring I have returned to this “early internal art gallery” and through my own painting I feel a sort of transformation of  memory material is taking place.

 

Food, slave ships, circumstances, positivity and happiness…

“Taking in the good is not about putting a happy shiny face on everything, nor is it about turning away from the hard things in life. It’s about nourishing well-being, contentment, and peace inside that are refuges you can always come from and return to.”— Rick Hanson

For this week’s post I had planned to write about food and how it is related to our attachment histories and dynamics in our adult relationships, early adverse childhood experiences and the use of food as a coping mechanism, adolescence, individuation and food, the messages that food and mealtimes can convey, which can vary from generosity, gratitude and love to control and punishment. I wrote a first draft and gathered bits of information on things like kitchen therapy, which is a new approach for exploring not only relationships with food but with the people we eat with, the kitchen providing a setting for resolving internal and interpersonal conflicts, since our dinner tables may be associated with pleasure and connection or conflict, and where the kitchen could potentially become the setting for therapy. But the first draft never evolved into something more presentable mostly because I’ve been painting this month and painting takes up a lot of time, and also, because I’ve been reading a couple of books simultaneously.

Instead, I’d like to share a couple of the things I’ve been listening and reading while engaging with painting.

First, I’d like to share a poem by Lucille Clifton, a black American poet, which I came across as I was looking at images of ships for my painting. The poem is titled “slaveship”. Clifton describes the way that the slaves were loaded into the ships, literally “like spoons.” I found a children’s book about the development of sea vessels in history that I had bought for my son when he was young and even the brief description of slavery ships in it was hard to read without flinching. It also included a diagram of how human bodies were positioned like sardines or spoons as if they were boxes or some other kind of merchandise. It is difficult to digest how the concept of human is not simply to be assumed for all humans, and that historically, many people, including women, have been denied access into this category. I remembered my own fascination with old sailing ships when I was young. For a while I became quite adept at drawing them. I also came across a slave ship metaphor while listening to a podcast, where the speaker was reflecting on how we are in some sense aboard some kind of slave ship. At some level most of humanity is not free because from early on we have  been squeezed into small boxes in order to be intelligible and digestible, but we are all so much more,

slaveship

(Jesus, Angel, and Grace of God were names of ships that delivered slaves from Africa to the Americas)

loaded like spoons
into the belly of Jesus
where we lay for weeks for months
in the sweat and stink of our own
breathing
Jesus
why do you not protect us
chained to the heart of the Angel
where the prayers we never tell
are hot and red as our bloody ankles
Jesus
Angel
can these be men
who vomit us out from ships
called Jesus Angel Grace of God
onto a heathen country
Jesus
Angel
ever again
can this tongue speak
can this bone walk
Grace of God
can this sin live

I’d also like to share an article I read in Greater Good Magazine. The article, written by Jeremy Adam Smith, discusses how happiness and well-being are not always a choice and how social conditions and inequality affect our overall well-being. Smith supports a more inclusive perspective on this topic. Before I summarily present some of the ideas in the article I’d like to say, and I have tried to support this in all my posts, that a more inclusive approach of viewing issues and reality is always closer to the truth. Adopting a  both  // and approach is also less damaging when we evaluate and attribute reasons for people’s experience, and it is more helpful and empowering because it allows us to tap into agency and do the best we can within our contexts and circumstances.

Smith writes that outside of happiness studies, in other branches of psychology as well as fields like economics and sociology, happiness starts to look less like an individual choice and more like a product of institutional, economic, and historical forces, shaped by power differences between groups. It is interesting to consider why this blind spot exists in relation to happiness.  He adds that “The answer isn’t a simple one; it begins from a place of intellectual and cultural humility, of just not knowing exactly how actions, circumstances, and genetics interact to shape our subjective well-being.”

He also feels that there’s something dishonest in minimizing the role of social forces, and that this dishonestly can be rooted in discounting the experiences of people who are hurt or marginalized by those forces. He gives examples of what structural forces might look like in society. He writes: “Slavery was a structural force, setting a stubborn pattern of social, cultural, economic, and interpersonal relationships between Black and white Americans that persists to this day. The family is a force structured by laws about marriage, divorce, taxes, reproductive health, children—and the power men have historically had over those laws. Your social network is a structure shaped by interactions with other structures: where you went to school, the work you do, your gender, your race, your religion—everything about you that connects you to others.”  He also reminds us that structural forces are usually invisible to us, and most of us don’t notice the laws and institutions that shape our lives. They mostly become visible through study, concentration, and awareness.

He explains how Americans’ strong resistance to seeing structural forces, especially when it comes to how they shape individual opportunity, is a tendency with deep historical roots. He quotes the founder of American psychology, William James, in 1902, who wrote: “If you can change your mind, you can change your life”, which was empowering and healthier than focusing on pathology. In relation to the movement of positive psychology, he writes that it was revolutionary for the way it turned away from studying and treating dysfunction in individuals toward examining the practices and traits that helped people flourish. It was a move away from passivity, giving up and helplessness. He says: “In focusing on strengths, virtues, and happiness, positive psychology opened a door into human minds and relationships that science had long neglected. That was an important contribution. Unfortunately, however, this focus on the individual led many researchers and teachers to consciously reject structural explanations for individual misfortune and unhappiness, reflecting the affluent, European-American context in which their ideas grew.”

Smith concludes that the point isn’t that we should not take steps that could boost our resilience, improve our relationships and day to day levels of contentment, but rather we should not discount and underestimate the power of social forces in shaping our happiness and life satisfaction. He writes: “Acknowledging the impact of structural forces on well-being needn’t be a recipe for helplessness”

You can read the article at: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_much_control_do_you_have_over_your_own_happiness?utm_source=Greater+Good+Science+Center&utm_campaign=50b8b6564b-EMAIL_CAMPAIGN_GG_Newsletter_May_12_2022&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_5ae73e326e-50b8b6564b-70743655